A long ending.

Today I was torn between wanting this day to be over and wanting to make it last forever. I always feel like this whenever there was a little holiday or a break. Part of me wants to get back to routine and just get on with things but I also do enjoy the extra time to do things that I want to do not so much HAVE to do. Not to mention the headaches I've been having.

I've had a headache on and off since the beginning of winter break back in December and I don't feel like that's normal. Today was a great day. I got to get out and do things I enjoy with people I enjoy. I just... had a headache all day and it's really putting a damper in everything I do. I couldn't focus to study or do any readings. I really just wanted to sleep and it just wasn't an option. I'm thinking the best thing for me to do is go to the doctor about it and see if it's just a stress related thing or if I should be concerned. We will see within the next week how that all works out.

Back to my day.... I had a lot of fun spending time with some good friends. I went to Petland and fell in love with yet another bulldog. I don't know what it is about these English Bulldogs that just make me fall in love with them. I also think it's my nurturing skills kicking in that whenever I see a puppy or a kitten or a baby, I just want it. I dunno, it's entirely too weird to me in this stage of my life right now but maybe I just want something to need me. This thought is entirely too scary for me but I'm looking forward to what is to come in the FAR future. (but I could have this English Bulldog any day!)

I also ended up going to Sam's Club and it made me realize that there are just some things that do not need to be sold in bulk. I mean, I understand people wanting to save money and stuff but mattresses? And selling candy in bulk? That's asking for diabetes and that's one thing I do not need right now much less ever. I'm kind of proud of myself though. I admit, I bought a few things I probably shouldn't have, like a giant bag of kettle corn, but a lot of the things I looked at I kept thinking "I couldn't eat all of that." I feel as though maybe that is my conscience telling me about portion controls. I dunno. I could just be crazy.

After that I just spent some time in the dorms of Kentwood which is nice from time to time. I watched probably one of my favorite movies 500 Days of Summer, and it just finished my day off right. I love the movie and everything it really explains. That not everything is perfect and that sometimes, love happens and sometimes it doesn't. That doesn't make it any less real and any less important in life. I think it proves that you have to consume yourself in something you love and things will happen when they need to happen; just let fate take over. I love it. Not to mention the amazing soundtrack. :)

Well, it's time to wrap this one up. I have classes in the morning and I'm already kind of behind in reading but I plan to catch up here quite soon. I dedicate this blog to fate: may you take care of everything and let people just... live.

Wherever fate demands me... I will go.

-Gertudis Gomez de Avellaneda

Something new.

It's a new year. I'm determined to have a new start. And with a new start, I think I'm gonna try something new. A friend of mine started a blog and I thought "Well, maybe I should." and well, I'm here. I think this will be a good way for me to express feelings and hardships as well as get out all the happiness I may be having in one day. It will be a good chance for me to look back and see where I've been in my life and I hope to keep this up. I've made a few resolutions and I'm going to strive to keep them. We'll see the progress or lack there of.

First and foremost, I want to lose some weight. I'm unhappy with where I am at in my life weight-wise and I have got to do something about it. I'm a college student who is stuck on a campus with typical college cafeteria food. I need to start eating wiser and becoming a bit more active. I think this is possible if I just put my mind to it. I need to make healthier food decisions and I hope to by eating more vegetables and meat that is cooked in a healthier way. I have a weakness for sweets so it's going to be pretty hard to stay away but there's nothing I can't do and I just have to keep that mentality.

I want to be a little more organized with my life. As a Resident Assistant at a University, I have a lot of paperwork that tend to find themselves lost. This is not the best thing and it's quite easily taken care of if I just make a point to keep organized. I noticed that when I get tired and busy with school and activities that instead of putting things away, I set them aside and plan to do them later. I am ultimately the world's best procrastinator. Hopefully I can become more diligent in doing things as soon as I see them needing to be done. This will be one of those things that I will have to consciously think about. But it's do-able.

As a student, I have to have one thing in mind at all time: grades. I am college student that hopes to someday have a degree in my hand and it won't happen with C's and D's. I have had quite a few hard semesters lately and they have proven to be a challenge. But I cannot let a few bad situations happening bring my whole college career come to an end. I have to have the determination to achieve good grades. This year, I am turning things around and I am making this year the one where I get no lower than a B in any of my classes. I am hoping to transfer to a new University where it's a bit more challenging, not to mention pricy. I think this will be an obstacle but I hope that I can get motivation and the strong desire to succeed will help me achieve what I want with my college experience and not just mediocre grades.

One of the bigger wishes I want for myself this year is to be a little bit more positive. I am an overall positive person but I think over the past years, my luck has brought me down and I don't like it one bit. I need to look at the brighter side of things. I need to remember how lucky I am to be where I am. I think I've already noticed some improvement but it's just the beginning. I hope to utilize my friends and family and sorority sisters for a support system when I get down and frustrated to bring myself back up. I am happy to have the people I have in my life and sometimes I need a reminder to bring my spirits back up and my head back in the game.

I hope with this blog I can see improvement or maybe where I'm going wrong. I want people to read this and comment or just get a kick out of my random days or just have people relate to me. I'm about to start something new. And frankly, I'm excited. I dedicate this blog to 2011: may you be good to me, my friends, and family.

Happiness is like a butterfly; 

the more you chase it, the more it will elude you,

but if you turn your attention to other things, 

it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.

-Henry David Thoreau